I've got a lotta things to do tonight

I'm so sick of making lists

Of things I'll never finish

I've lived here for the last 12 years

Since early 1995 all my shit has been in boxes

But if I had a little more time to kill

I'd settle every little stupid thing

Yeah you'd think that I would



But I'm too tired to go to sleep tonight

And I'm too weak to follow dreams tonight

For the first time in a long time I can say

That I want to try to get better and

In my own way



I wonder if I'll ever lose my mind

I tried hard for awhile

But then I kinda gave up

Winter is a killer when the sun goes down

"I'm really not as stubborn as I seem,"

Said the knuckle to the concrete



But I'm too tired to go to sleep tonight

And I'm too weak to follow dreams tonight

For the first time in a long time I can say

That I want to try to get better and

In my own way



I'm not saying that I'm giving up

I'm just trying not to think as much as I used to

Cause "never" is a lonely little messed up word

Maybe I'll get it right some day

For the first time in a long time I can say

That I want to try

I feel helpless for the most part

But I'm learning to open my eyes

And the sad truth of the matter is

I'll never get over it

But I'm gonna try

In my own way



I so want to get back on track

And I'll do whatever it takes

Even if it kills me