I remember years ago a place I loved to go 

Palm trees, sunshine beaches and never any snow 

Then bastards came in numbers to infiltrate the place 

Crime and murder rates have soared in Florida's disgrace 

Now they've ruined Miami, they've let it go to piss 

Now they've ruined Miami, there's nothing left to miss 

Now they've ruined Miami, and my vacation plans 

Guess I'II have to stay at home until they fix it. man! 

Now they've got new gun laws, and everybody's armed 

They say it's their protection, no need to be alarmed 

I hate to be sarcastic but I wear the shoe that fits 

Miami is a city that has all but gone to shvit 

I really wish I didn't have to write sarcastic songs 

But modern day society has got to right these wrongs 

Old men and women now have guns and they can't even drive 

They can't aim, and they can't shoot and we cannot survive 

Cemeteries filling up, they'll have to make some room 

People wasting people, I sense impending doom 

So if you love Miami, you'll get what you deserve 

Better pack a bullet proof vest, and pills to soothe your nerves