Gather round and listen

As I tell you now this tale

The grim legacy of the pirates three

And how their lives ceased to be

I'll tell you know of Redrum

He got a case of scurvy rot

And then that bastard was no more



This is the tale of Captain Crashride

By his crew, condemned and damned

And as if this wasn't bad enough

They replace him with a baldy man

Now his ghost haunts the sea

Eternally he's doomed to wander

Mayhaps you'll hear his deathly cries

C'mon son, buy a Honda!



To the end of time we will sail the seas

With cutlasses in hand

We'll terrorize the land

Though the hands of fate may strike us down

We'll fight til we fall

Swashbucklers til we die



This is the tale of Admiral Nobeard

The fattest pirate in the west

He's never seen his ball before

And he needs a bra to hold his breasts

Feared by friends and foe alike

No sword nor gun could wound his flesh

But one day he met his fate

Twas on a pretzel he choked to death