Outside the carolers start to sing

I can't describe the joy they bring

'Cause joy is something they don't bring me



My girlfriend is by my side

From the roof are hanging sickles of ice

Their whiny voices get irritating

It's Christmas time again



So I stand with a dead smile on my face

Wondering how much of my time they'll waste

Oh God, I hate these satan's helpers



And then I guess I must have snapped

Because I grabbed a baseball bat

And made them all run for shelter



It's Christmas time again

It's time to be nice to the people you can't stand all year

I'm growing tired of all this Christmas cheer

You people scare me, please stay away from my home

If you don't wanna get beat down

Just leave the presents and then leave me alone



Well, I guess it's not cool to freak on Christmas Eve

'Cause the cops came and arrested me

They had an unfair advantage



And even though the jail didn't have a tree

Christmas came a night early

'Cause a guy named Bubba unwrapped my package



It's Christmas time again

It's time to be nice to the people you can't stand all year

I'm growing tired of all this Christmas cheer

You people scare me, please stay away from my home

If you don't wanna get beat down

Just leave the presents and then leave me alone



I won't be home

I won't be home for Christmas

I won't be home

I won't be home for Christmas

(Please post my bail)



I won't be home

I won't be home for Christmas

(Please post my bail)

I won't be home

I won't be home for Christmas

(Please post my bail)



I won't be home

I won't be home for Christmas

(Please post my bail)

I won't be home

I won't be home for Christmas