Do you think you can fool me?

Do you think you can lie to my face?

Do you think I believe you?

Well, what you tell me is a total waste



Do you think you can use me?

I bet you think that you are great

Do you think you can get away with murder?

I think you can use a kick in the face



Eh - you can fool some of the people some of the time

And you can fool most of the people all of the time

Ah - you can fool a few of the people none of the time

But you can’t fool me any of the time



So I sit and I eat a TV dinner

I watch an old funny Marx Brothers movie

And a flash comes across my TV screen

And it’s you in all of your glory



You like to tell me about brutal murders

You make me choke on my pasgetti

Korean airlines that was shot down by the Russians

You even show the dead peoples’ families crying



Well, you can gross out some of the people some of the time

Eh - you can gross out most of the people none of the time

Most of the people like to get grossed out all of the time

Ain’t that right

But you make me sick every time, every time



I see your face is laced with a new kind of taste

It’s great the way you waste all that space

You’re right, it’s night and I shouldn’t go outside

But if a stiletto stabs me

It’ll make your job so exciting

If a razor cut me

You can give them something worth watching



We interrupt this song to bring you a special news bulletin. Hello, this is Wilma Wasko, anchorwoman at the Eyewitness News Center in New York. Hey - do I have your attention? Look at me, me, me (etc.) I’m on TV. Check this out, ladies and gents. This is good stuff, real good stuff, real good-good-good-good-good-good great stuff.



The two bodies of Trisha and Connie... (uh, what was their last name?) (That doesn’t matter, anyway). The bodies of two young school children were discovered today buried in the Carle Place Rushmore Grade School playground at ten o’clock this morning. Despite the semi-decayed carcasses of the young school girls (who were found to be 10 and 11 years old), the autopsy report shows that the girls were brutally raped, strangled, beaten and stabbed excessively. Young Trisha was reported to have at least 27 knife wounds in the chest and stomach area, with severe stabbings in the neck, head and eyes. Young Connie was found to have a severed left leg and heart displacement. And it is this doctor’s opinion that anal sex was performed on the dead bodies after the brutal, slaughterous act was done. Details at 10.



The junk that you feed to my children

Is junk that you believe in

I don’t care about crooked politicians

I don’t wanna see someone bleeding while I’m eating



And when you review a motion picture

You like to kill the actors and writers

You do this to feed your own ego

So your own life won’t seem so damn miserable



Well, you could screw some of the people some of the time

And you do screw most of the people all-a-da’ time

Ah - you could screw a few-a-da’ people a couple of times

But you can’t screw me any of the time, any of the time...