Standin' in the runway

Wavin' at the plane

There goes everything you own

You called home collect

And they didn't know your name

Starin' at the telephone



You thought he was a doctor

But now he says he's not

But the voices seem to tell for sure

And according to the symptoms

It isn't all you got

A shame they haven't found a cure



Gettin' hard to reason

You start to feel the rub

You know it isn't easy

Well, welcome to the club



Well, you thought they'd take it lightly

They're actin' kinda rash

Caught you in a loadin' zone

So they smile impolitely

Relieve you of your cash

Suddenly you're all alone



You play the double agent

You know your cover's blown

You got the place surrounded

There ain't nobody home



It's gettin' hard to please 'em

You start to feel the rub

You know it isn't easy

Well, welcome to the club

Come on and join us in the club