I'm tired of self respect

I can't afford a car

I want to be a prefab superstar 



I want to be a tool

Don't need no soul

want to make big money

Playing rock and roll 



I'll make my music boring

I'll play my music slow

I ain't no artist, I'm a business man

No ideas of my own 



I won't offend 

Or rock the boat

Just sex and drugs

And rock and roll 



Drool, drool, drool, drool, drool, drool

My Payola!

Drool, drool, drool, drool, drool, drool

My Payola! 



You'll pay ten bucks to see me

On a fifteen foot high stage

Fatass bouncers kick the shit

Out of kids who try to dance 



If my friends say

I've lost my guts

I'll laugh and say 

That's rock and roll 



But there's just one problem



[Chorus]

Is my cock big enough

Is my brain small enough

For you to make me a star

Give me a toot, I'll sell you my soul

Pull my strings and I'll go far 



And when I'm rich

And meet Bob Hope

We'll shoot some golf

And shoot some dope 



Is my cock big enough?

Is my brain small enough?



[Chorus]