Ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba, ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba

Well I thought about the army
Dad said, son you're f***ing high
And I thought, yeah there's a first for everything
So I took my old man's advice
Three sad semesters
It was only fifteen grand spent in bed
I thought about the army
I dropped out and joined a band instead

Grew a moustache and a mullet
Got a job at Chic-fil-a
Citing artistic differences
The band broke up in may
And in June reformed without me
And they'd got a different name
I nuked another Grandma's apple pie
And hung my head in shame, oh nooo

I've been thinking a lot today
I've been thinking a lot today

Oh, I think I'll write a screenplay
Oh, I think I'll take it to LA
Oh, I think I'll get it done yesterday

Ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba, ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba

In this time of introspection
On the eve of my election
I say to my reflection
God, please spare me more rejection
'Cause my peers, they criticize me
And my ex-wives all despise me
Try to put it all behind me
But my redneck past is nipping at my heels

I've been thinking a lot today
I've been thinking a lot today
I've been thinking a lot today
I thought about your mommy